i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize