Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
