i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize