I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize