He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize