she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
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