Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Randomize
