no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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