Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
