Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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