Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
you would pick up someone in the library
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
