Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
