We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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