Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
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