We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
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