out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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