I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Im part way to drunk.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
