Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
