if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
