The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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