if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
