all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
