What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize