East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
