maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize