Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
