I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize