2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Never underestimate the power of titties
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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