She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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