I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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