that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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