I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
