Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
