So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
