he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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