Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
