Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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