Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
