we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
