i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
