When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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