You really coming over, don't trick.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
