we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
