You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
