I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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