I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
