matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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