thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
