So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
