I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
